What are you afraid of being?
In the last week, I’ve had two different clients share with me that they are afraid of being seen a certain way, so it stops them from showing up. Both of these people had mentioned things that, based on their personal brands, were absolutely IMPOSSIBLE for them to show up as…if they were showing up authentically.
But the fear is still there. It might be for you too. So, let’s explore it :)
What we’re afraid of being
When it really comes down to it, generally the things we are afraid of being are the things that are as far away from our personal values as possible.
Fear of being perceived as arrogant vs. always considering people first
Fear of being perceived as imposing vs. a commitment to belonging and everyone being heard
Fear of being perceived as controlling vs. always respecting other people
The fear is based upon us being perceived in the exact OPPOSITE way that we are. If it wasn’t tied so closely to the things we care about the most, it wouldn’t matter to us ;)
What we actually are
So, if the thing we’re afraid of being is the polar opposite of what we are, then it makes sense that we don’t want to be perceived that way. But here’s what also makes sense…if you show up as you ACTUALLY ARE (which is the exact opposite of that), there’s no possible way someone could perceive you that way.
(Unless they’re insane, in which case worrying about that scenario is just a waste of mental calories.)
The trouble with fear
The trouble with fear is it stops us. It stops us from taking action. It stops us from sharing our stories. It keeps our voice inside our bodies. It keeps us playing small.
When you have a solution that truly helps people, it doesn’t do any good for anyone for this to be the case.
You stop helping people. Again, as far from your natural state as possible.
The fear is keeping us from showing up. AND the fear is based on something we can’t possibly be.
Think of it this way
It would be like me saying, “I’m afraid of having short hair (I have long hair), so I’m not going to look in the mirror because I MIGHT have short hair.”
But I DON"‘T have short hair. Not looking in the mirror actually ADDS to my insecurity created by that fear.
You not showing up has the same effect. Every time you DON’T show up as the thing that you fear, it feels safe. But the safer thing would be to look in the mirror, see that I don’t have short hair, and let it go.
Letting it go
Here’s the thing. Your fear is telling you something wonderful about your personal brand. It’s telling you, “I’m not like that”.
That’s something to be PROUD of. Not afraid of.
So when you encounter those moments of feeling FEAR of something you DON’T WANT TO BE, tell yourself, “I’m not like that, and if I show up as my authentic self, more people will know that.”
Don’t hide yourself from the world because you’re afraid of being what you’re not. Because you’re not that.
Be who you are and shine your light.
If you’re not sure how, let’s chat :)
