It Takes Two to Convo

You're probably familiar with the phrase, "it takes two to Tango".

It's true.

And where do you think the POWER in the Tango comes from?

❌ It's not the choreography (although that helps)

❌ It's not the skill of the individual parties (although that helps)

❌ It's not the music (although that helps)

It's the CONNECTION.

The connection between the two parties.

This is also true of a conversation (aka CONVO in this scenario) 😉

It's not about the choreography (aka. the script and funnel). It's not about the skill of the individual parties (no matter how much one - or both - of them are experts). It's not about the music (the setup or the environment).

It's about how connected the humans feel to each other.

Today, I'd like to talk about what THAT👆 kind of connection looks like when it comes to business...specifically in networking, marketing and sales.

Let's explore 🔍

The Networking Tango

I think a lot of times networking becomes all about the number of people you've been able to pitch to. But we all know what it feels like to receive a pitch...especially if you haven't asked for one.

What if we actually looked at the person we were meeting as a fellow participant in a conversation? On an equal playing field. In an opportunity to be curious?

You see, if we look at networking as pitching, our experience of it is, "I'm serving someone a pitch". It's not about the other person RECEIVING the pitch. It's just about me making it. Plus, I when I say the same thing to everyone, now I'm REALLY not trying to participate on a team with the recipient...because if I WAS, I would take into account this person's uniqueness 💡

But what if we looked at a conversation from a TEAM perspective. Like I'm the one tossing the ally-oop pass, and you're the one dunking the ball. I can't do both of those things simultaneously, and neither can you. We NEED each other to accomplish something. Same goes for a conversation.

And when it comes to an equal playing field, we go back to the TEAM perspective. We are on the SAME team trying to accomplish the same thing (a connection). If I don't pass, we don't score. If you don't slam, we don't score. My role isn't more important. Your role isn't more important. It takes both of us to meet the goal.

P.S. The fact that VC's are still asking people to share their messages this was is INSANE to me. But maybe that's to maintain the power dynamic?

And lastly, what about adding "being curious" to the equation? Sure, you have something YOU want people to know. And likewise, there are probably things THEY want you to know about them. Are we being curious enough to invite that to the table? Or are we doing all the talking?

So, take away the environment of the experience (the music), the choreography (the pitch), and the expertise, and what do you have left?

Two people. Having a conversation.

Creating the opportunity for them to remember each other 💖

The Marketing Tango

Now, you might think that Marketing isn't actually a dance at all because it's only about me telling you who I am and what I do. And sure, it might look this way when you think about big companies doing big advertising. But at the end of the day, effective marketing is about people FEELING LIKE they are in a conversation.

Which doesn't happen without INTENTION.

If you're a marketer, you probably already have the following things:

• Marketing Funnel (choreography)

• Marketing Skills (graphic design, copywriting, project management)

• Brand Guidelines (background music)

AND...you probably DON'T have a lot of marketing conversations.

That's because, just like with the actual Tango, these things don't inherently CREATE the connection. If you're dancing over here, and your potential clients are dancing over THERE, none of these things actually ADD to a conversation.

But they CAN. With Intention 😉

Let's look at the Marketing Funnel first. Now, it's great to have choreography. And you can dance it solo as much as you like. But that doesn't mean that people will just invite themselves into the conversation. YOU have to invite them to dance.

And the basic Marketing Skills that most people look for in a job description? Yeah, those have nothing to do with an ability to ask people to dance.

And how about Brand Guidelines? If you know me, you know that brand is the central foundation of everything that I do. But it's MORE than a Brand Guideline book that talks about how to use your logo, colors and narrative. It's about LIVING that on a day to day basis...both inside and outside the company. In the Tango example, it's the ALIGNED movement with your Brand Partners; clients, prospects, vendors, employees, partners and investors.

Let me ask you...if I took away your Marketing Funnel, your Marketing Skills and your Brand Guidelines, could YOU (just you), have a conversation with someone else?

I would guess so ✨

THAT'S👆 your Marketing Tango.

The Sales Tango

And what about sales? Can you draw some similarities between what we've already discussed?

• Sales Funnel (scripted touches)

• Sales Skills (is persuasion coming up for anyone else?)

• Brand Guidelines (that's a marketing thing, right?)

Ok, I'm gonna rant on sales scripts here for a second because THEY AREN'T A CONVERSATION!!!

And I get it, you can't script for EVERY possible thing a recipient might say, so it seems like it makes sense to script it with a one-directional focus.

BUT NO CONVERSATION HAPPENS THAT WAY.

A pitch might happen that way, but not a conversation.

And let me ask all my sales friends out there if they ever sold anything in a direct sale WITHOUT a conversation?

I know I haven't.

And let's not even get started on the current Sales AI in the market. All it's doing is MORE of these non-conversational touches. Sure, you might have responses, but what about that "getting curious" component we talked about earlier?

Now, there's probably a lot of people who disagree with me. But to me, sales, at the end of the day, is about building relationships. And relationships get built through bi-directional conversation.

Now a little aside related to persuasion.

Again, I think a lot of people THINK sales is about persuading people to buy stuff. And if that's your focus, that will likely feel like what's happening.

BUT...what if sales WASN'T about persuading just anyone to buy your stuff, and it was instead about solving specific problems for specific people?

And how do we find out about people's problems?

WE LISTEN.

And the other party can tell that we care through that listening.

Only when someone trusts you will they reveal their real problems.

And THEN...once you know someone has a problem you can solve...well, now you're just a helpful friend 😊

And lastly, from a Brand Guideline perspective...sales and marketing serve the SAME business. Therefore, they are building the same brand. The same house for all of us to live in.

Sales is NOT creating something that Marketing isn't creating.

We spiral together into the same brand experience.

Or we don't and we break our brand experience; not a great option.

So yes, sales and marketing (and dare I say networking in general) all roll up to ONE brand experience. So, the music is the same. Are sales and marketing dancing in an aligned way for your organization?

Hmm...yet another connection to consider 🤔

Connections = Transactions

When we come down to it, in all of these areas, we tend to think that connections and transactions are two different things. But what if they weren't?

What if...when you REALLY look at the data...ALL of your transactions were prefaced with a true connection.

Would you look at connection as the intention differently?

It is possible to make these types of connections in networking, sales and marketing. And it doesn't even take a change in your networking spaces, number of sales touches or marketing tactics to bring that to life.

It just takes the INTENTION of creating a connection.

NOT a transaction.

A CONNECTION.

Which takes an investment from both parties.

So, are you just PITCHING? Or are you giving enough, or being curious enough, for the other party to even want to have another conversation with you?

If you'd like some support in creating REAL connections in your networking, marketing and sales efforts, let's chat 💖